Two long, short years

12 Sep

This is a not satisfactory blog today. It’s two years today since Rosie died. At this point we were beginning to ring round family and friends to let them know.  I sometimes wonder why we didn’t let people know she’d gone into hospital and that it wasn’t looking very good, but I think it’s because we didn’t believe it ourselves. And we wanted our daughter to ourselves.

 

I was going to put up a nice new picture of her and write some nice things but I can’t. Not at the moment. Because at the moment I’m sad and angry. Angry at the unfairness, angry at the waste and angry at people who have their lives and who moan about things, take no responsibility for anything, and waste the life they’ve got. That’s not about anyone in particular – just generally. Although writing it has just made me feel a bit better.

 

It’s so unfair for her. So unfair.

 

I shall return later today. Rosie’s aunt and uncle are coming this evening which she’d have been very pleased about, as are we. Flowers for our girl and food and chat just like she liked. And I want to do a better Remembering Rosie blog as well. What do you remember about her?

 

Jo

 

 

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25 Responses to “Two long, short years”

  1. Sheena September 12, 2013 at 6:14 am #

    Thinking of you all today. Laugh and remember with love and joy. Smiles and tears xxx

  2. Sue September 12, 2013 at 7:25 am #

    I remember her smile and the twinkle in her eyes! Big Hug to you all :)x

  3. Helen Davies September 12, 2013 at 7:52 am #

    Jo & family, you are in our thoughts, lots of love from Beth’s Wish xxx

  4. thissceptredisle September 12, 2013 at 8:26 am #

    I remember so many incidences that made us smile, Ro was such a character. I really admired the way she was developing into a young adult with a conscience, with ideas and principles. She had no qualms about pulling someone up if they made a casually prejudicial or unfair remark, no qualms about wanting to be heard, expressing her opinions.(oh yes!) But she was also, on the quiet, such a great friend to Gee ( and others) when they needed it, kind and genuine, thoughtful and gave such good advice.
    So glad to have known her, regret not knowing her longer xx

    Sue

  5. Andrea Clarke September 12, 2013 at 8:30 am #

    I never had the good luck to meet Rosie. But through her blog came to know an inspiring and brave young woman who loved life, loved family, loved friends.
    Rosie continues to inspire me.

    Much love to you all.

    Andrea xx

  6. Lucy and Russ September 12, 2013 at 8:51 am #

    I remember her turning up to family parties and the surprised/raised eyebrow/loving looks from the older generation after they saw what she was wearing that day. I remember sitting on the floor chatting about nothing in particular at those parties (its nice that we still sit on the floor and chat about nothing in particular, I think she would like that). I remember how she taught us all G-Day Bruce and she drove my brother-in-law mad with one of her riddles on our holiday to Spain. But most of all I remember Rosie, just Rosie being Rosie. Much Love to Jo, Chris, Cal and Sylvie.

  7. Lin September 12, 2013 at 9:38 am #

    Everything. From holding that tiny thing in my arms in the garden in Hutton Rudby, through “she’s not normally like this”, chicken dinners, earring debates, trying on all my jewellery, silly txt spk texts about boys, insisting in travelling in MY car, playing with rats (Magda and ??????), and laughing…..a lot. Everything
    And unfair? – hell, yes, that doesn’t even come close.

    But today I will remember the laughing – as Sheena says, smiles and tears
    Thinking about you all, with love xxxxxxxxxxxx

    • Lin September 12, 2013 at 10:51 am #

      Ohhhh and insisting on “Jemery” when she fell over ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ™‚ (Penarth I think…..)

  8. celia butler September 12, 2013 at 9:40 am #

    Life isn’t fair, and you as a family have suffered the worst unfairness at all. None of the good that has happened as a result goes anywhere towards making up for that.
    What is loud and clear two years on is that Rosie won’t be forgotten, even by people who never met her, in living memory. Her impact is as strong as ever. So my thoughts on remembering Rosie would be that ‘Rosie is’.
    Love and hugs to you all on this especially difficult day. xx

  9. Julia September 12, 2013 at 10:21 am #

    I remember Rosie at our wedding aged 3 months and perfectly behaved, and from the age of 4 insisting that we go to the pub for lunch, and yes “she’s not normally like this” and insisting on travelling in our car, cutting out skeletons at Halloween, doing handstands for hours in the garden, wanting to join in with whatever the grown-ups were doing, wanting the grown-ups to join in with whatever she was doing, and always pleased to have visitors even when she was very ill.

    Thinking of you all xx

  10. Susan Hughes September 12, 2013 at 10:40 am #

    I never met Rosie. My daughter, Sophie, only spent two weeks with her at summer school but they had such fun and she made such a huge impression. Rosie’s blog and now yours, Jo, is an inspiration to us all. Warmest wishes to you all on this sad day and always x

  11. Debbie September 12, 2013 at 10:58 am #

    That sideways look, slightly incredulous but somehow managing to contain a huge streak of mischief. Sitting in the hut at Portland Bill and writing out our picnic menu as though we were dining out at a top restaurant, with requisite embroidered language. How she grew to become such a slim and beautiful teenager, with a gorgeous smile. Her gothic look – how dark was she going to get? How from a very tender age she was so much “her own person”. How lovely she was with my nieces and nephew when we were hoping to see The Eclipse in Dorset. Her astounding ability to handle Chris. (;-)). Her deep love for her family, and how prominent was her concern for them during her illness when most might be entirely self-focussed. Rosie’s gift for being able to communicate so brilliantly, with disarming honesty. How often, even her descriptions of the most difficult experiences were tinged with wit, tempering her news for the soft skinned mortals we are. How she made me feel like a friend, not just a friend of her parents.
    Miss you Rosie, and thinking of you all today. X

  12. Jane September 12, 2013 at 1:52 pm #

    Everytime I use my Chicken Dinner tea towel I smile & remember Rosie, so colourful & full of life, her legacy will live on and on. Thinking of you all today and sending hugs x

  13. Andy Millin September 12, 2013 at 2:14 pm #

    I didn’t know Rosie for very long, but in that short period She’s transformed my life in more ways than she will ever know, just by being Rosie. Today is particularly tough for me as another friend has been rushed to hospital with 3 tumours and bleak prospects. Like Rosie, she is a fighter, and always upbeat about general life. Miss you loads..x

  14. Audrey Davidson September 12, 2013 at 3:47 pm #

    One of my most treasured memories of Rosie, and there are 19 years worth, is when she was about 6 years old and all the grandchildren were staying with us for the weekend. I was in our garden when Rosie came bouncing out of the house and apropos of nothing she gave me her lovely smile and said “I do like being here with you Grandma” what a proud moment for a doting Grandma no wonder my pet name for her was “My Precious

    Girl” and so she will always be

    Girl Girl and that

    • celia butler September 12, 2013 at 5:14 pm #

      Audrey, I so understand what you mean. It’s such a special relationship with a grandchild (as I’ve found out myself over the last nearly 3 years), they are more precious than words can say. Have been thinking of you today as well as Jo and family.xx

  15. Amy September 12, 2013 at 4:07 pm #

    How she liked to wear socks in bed, our feasts, her nails, how she could eat chocolate and crisps first thing in the morning, how she would tell me off if I knocked on the front door and didn’t just come straight in, she always put positives into everything, her love of post, her honesty, her hoard of DVDs, she was always good at telling stories, the way she put kisses at the end of her texts, when she told me her idea for TKOE when she was recovering from surgery, she always made time for people, our conversations. I could probably go on all day, she’s the loveliest of all people, but I shall go and make chicken wraps and think of all the amazing things about her, and you guys. All my love, Amy xxxx

  16. Jonquil September 12, 2013 at 4:51 pm #

    Like Andrea, I was not lucky enough to meet Rosie, though heard of some of her exploits from you. And from her blog, I think of the amazing strength that took bad news and took it head-on. Not many people of any age would have had the courage to write some of the things that she did โ€“ Iโ€™m thinking here of the day she found out that she had been classified as terminal, but only a few days later she could write โ€œthat just means Iโ€™ve got to try a bit harder in the mental positivity stakesโ€.

    I have been thinking lots about you all recently, because some of the acorns I scattered around on the day of her funeral are now coming up as saplings. So there will be Rosie oaks around for years to come, strong and beautiful like her.

    With love to you all

  17. Michelle September 12, 2013 at 6:26 pm #

    I wore my domino earrings today and my boss commented on them. He said they were very nice and I told him all about Rosie, TKOE, monies raised, and how her legacy is being carried onwards by all of you.
    Like Andrea I didn’t meet her, but she inspired me, and made me laugh, and cry with her brilliant use of words.

    • Lin September 12, 2013 at 7:05 pm #

      Goodness so did I! Domino earrings I mean…and talked about Ro all day:)
      And hello Mich ๐Ÿ™‚

      • Michelle September 15, 2013 at 9:48 pm #

        Hi Lin, hope you’re okay. I love my earrings, love telling people how inspirational Rosie is to all of us.

  18. Helen & Harrie September 12, 2013 at 8:34 pm #

    Rosie never seems that far from our thoughts. Is it really 2 yrs? I remember you letting me know the very sad news about your lovely daughter Ro and I was worried about how I would tell Harrie. I have just asked Harrie what is one memory that stands out for her and she said ‘Rosie didn’t like crocs’! I had forgotten that! I remember that smile and positivity. The time she had a blue steak in her hair and Harrie wanting one too so I went and bought some clip in ones for her! And of course, how fasinated she was with Alan and she was convinced he had blown her a kiss. Through u, her family, friends and charity she will always be with us. We send you all our love xxx

  19. Sue, Evie and Gwen September 12, 2013 at 9:21 pm #

    She was our friend. She made us all feel special. And we miss her.

  20. Becky Gough September 13, 2013 at 5:38 pm #

    One of my favourite memories of ro is when she came over my house before a wired gig …she took a fancy to one of my dresses but I’m quite flat chested and well …ro wasn’t …lol so she was stood with her arms in the air while I tried to zip her in. We headed up town and after all that the dress tore mid-gig…a random stranger lent her safety pins so we could patch it up and rush back to mine so she could change …but ro decided she liked it better like that ๐Ÿ™‚ xxx

  21. Judy McCarthy September 14, 2013 at 9:22 am #

    The first time I met Rosie in the playground of Bromesberrow school, she asked me if I knew who her mum was! I told her that yes I did and I think I was alright then!! (I was on the governing body at the time, so yes, I did know who you were, Jo! )

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