:(

14 Dec

Alright, have been quiet on here cos have been feeling really out of sorts. Suppose it is because  it’s been three months this week; dark days; wet and windy; a lovely family gathering which wasn’t the first one Rosie hasn’t been too, but you know what I mean when I say she wasn’t there. Or here when we got home.

Have started doing Christmas cards as well – we’ve decided that we are still going to put Rosie’s name in them, in brackets; something we’ve learned is how nice it is when people send us cards and write something in there about Rosie too. It’s very stark to see her name not there. I’d never thought about that when I’d sent cards to people where someone in their family has died.

It’s not all dismal though . .  .Cal has been offered a place at Foxes for next Sept. 🙂 It may just have been the mention of meringue cake which swung it.   Just have to go on the trail for funding now, which will not be straightforward. But that’s a new year job.

Think we might try the beech leaf noyau tonight.

Jo

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20 Responses to “:(”

  1. Natalie Bones December 14, 2011 at 8:38 pm #

    Well done Cal!!! 🙂 Rosie would be so pleased xxx

  2. Andrea Clarke December 14, 2011 at 8:43 pm #

    I confess I’ve been worrying about you all more and more the nearer that we get to Christmas. but i hope you know we’re all here, sending love, and warmth, and hugs, and thoughts of Rosie (who i think about all the time).

    i know what you mean about not seeing names. after my parents died i changed the phone book on our phone to just have Mum and Dad meaning Robin’s parents (it seemed logical), but it upset me so much that i had to change them back to read Robin’s Mum etc. and that’s how they remain all these years later.

    fabulous news about Cal, and fingers crossed for the funding 🙂

    xxx

  3. robin December 14, 2011 at 8:51 pm #

    Hey my thoughts are with you all this xmas, must be strange and sad to see Rosies name missing from cards, and even more with her missing her first xmas without her family. I hope that you have as lovely a time as possible and that the new year brings with it better times.

    Cal going to Foxes is a great step in that direction.

    Best wishes xx xx

  4. Lucy and russ December 14, 2011 at 9:06 pm #

    Yay Cal! We are all so very proud of him and I’m certain that his big sister is the proudest of us all.

  5. Sheena Allan December 14, 2011 at 9:37 pm #

    Well done Calum, thats good news. Foxes will be lucky to have you.

    We recieved our Christmas card from our nephew and his wife. This is the first year they have not included their sons name along with their two daughters. He died 7 yrs ago aged 2. They must feel the time is right. You must do what you feel for as long as it feels right .

    Have you managed to decorate Rosie’s grave and not have it blown away? We are having terrible wind up here in Scotland……not related to anything we’ve eaten I may add!!! x x x

  6. Trudy Robertson. December 14, 2011 at 9:57 pm #

    Well done Cal.Thinking of you all.
    Trudy

  7. celia butler December 15, 2011 at 12:03 am #

    Had to google beech leaf noyau – sounds like a very good idea for this drab and dismal week.
    Tough tough times, so many hurdles and ‘first-withouts’, and Christmas is really difficult for those. You’ll get through somehow, one day at a time. Your Christmas card decision sounds just right.
    Great news about Foxes (although no surprise, they will be lucky to have him). Do you have a good Connexions adviser to work on the funding application?
    Thinking of you as always, love to you all. x

  8. Kath December 15, 2011 at 9:48 am #

    Very well done to Calum!

  9. DonnyFan December 15, 2011 at 10:47 am #

    the first year after a loss is very much the worst as you go through the first Christmas, birthday, Easter and so on.

    my best friend died in April 2005 and you know what? I still have her mobile number in my phone and I still text her a happy birthday wish once a year. And I can’t bring myself to cross her name out of my address book, it’s still there 🙂

    Gone but most definitely not forgotten.

    Rosie is still very much with you so it’s only right that her name is included on the cards I reckon xx

  10. Michelle Gabriel December 15, 2011 at 12:05 pm #

    Well done Calum, what a superstar Foxes are gaining, and a great cook by the sounds of it too.
    I think Rosie is still with us all, still here very much in spirit, even though not in body! She lives on through all of you.

  11. miriammcclay December 15, 2011 at 12:44 pm #

    Funny, weird time and how it makes us feel. Have been feeling cold and dark myself and I am thinking of you all still, thinking of Rosie, your Rosie. Well done Calum with one ‘L’. Winner winner.
    Turkey dinner soon. x

  12. Jonquil December 15, 2011 at 2:38 pm #

    The Norwegians call this morketiden (the murky, or dark, time), and at the best of times, I think it’s pretty dismal. It’s like the 4 a.m. of the year. Celia’s right, the “first withouts” are very hard, especially as Rosie’s birthday follows so soon after Christmas. And three months may feel some days like an awfully long time, but it’s no time at all really.

    I hope this is a warming thought : things are happening, and people are benefitting now from what Rosie did and was and what you continue to do and be.

    And that’s great news about Calum.
    x

  13. Helen December 15, 2011 at 6:43 pm #

    Congratulations to Calum, that’s great news 🙂

    I still have my grandparents names and telephone numbers in my mobile even though they are not around to call. I just can’t delete them.

    Like Jonquil said though, Rosie made such a difference to so many people, and still continues to.

    • jill Clayton December 15, 2011 at 9:56 pm #

      Rosie is still around. People are thinking of her. She is changing our behaviour. She is achieving great things. (I am not trying to put her forward for sainthood!)
      THanks to the wonders of technology, we can see her and hear her speak.
      I know it doesn’t fill the yawning gap.
      Congratulations to Calum.

  14. Katie December 15, 2011 at 10:48 pm #

    Well done to my lovely cousin Cal! 🙂 I made a cake for my chalet today and thought about Cal and whether he got his place! He’ll have to teach me the meringue cake, that would definately go down well out here in the snow! 🙂 lots of love to you all xxx

  15. Chloe Taylor-Jones December 16, 2011 at 1:46 am #

    Well done Calum!

    I received my first Christmas card today. It was a TKOE card.

    Xxx

  16. margaret crisp December 16, 2011 at 8:59 am #

    Congratulations Calum! Rosie would have been delighted that he’s been offered a place. I hope getting the funding isn’t too much of a headache.
    All well here, the storm was bad last night, but luckily the barn and greenhouses are all intact and we have electricity and a phone still. Have caught a cold, but with a day inside today hope it’ll be on its way elsewhere!
    mags.

    • Sue Trevethan December 16, 2011 at 4:40 pm #

      Here at Hope we are constantly talking about Rosie and just how much she has touched the lives of so many. Even young people who have never met her are inspired by all her achevements and what she stood for.

      As a mum my thoughts are with you,what a heart breaking time for you all x

  17. Helen December 18, 2011 at 11:18 am #

    Congratulations to Calum..great news. My sister & brother-in law live in Minehead (own the teddy shop!). You will have to discover Blenheim Gardens..a really nice park right near the shops that not many tourists know about! A tiny golf course, cafe, band stand with music in summer etc.! Also if you keep keep keep driving up the hill in Minehead you come to a lovely grass area for picnics with a nice view of Porlock and the sea.

    Things such as Christmas cards can be a huge thing which isn’t considered before as I found when my dad died when I was younger. So glad people have been mentioning Rosie and that she is very much in people’s thoughts, that must be a huge comfort.

    Have a merry christmas, as merry as it can possibly be xx

  18. carol lewis December 18, 2011 at 10:57 pm #

    Sending you love & strength to get through this Christmas but Rosie will be with you this year & forever xx

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