13 Jan

From: Jan – Bristol

Morning :)
I have a question for you….. my daughter has been looking at the vinspired website and one of the suggestions is that you email someone who is in hospital having cancer treatment etc. Do you think that would be helpful? I suppose its similar to doing this blog… ?? I would be interested in what you/everyone else thinks 🙂

Interesting. Now when I first thought about this I was immediately like no way I don’t want someone emailing me being all feeling sorry for me and stuff! But then I thought that’s actually quite a nice thing to do..but then I thought well what the hell would you say? I mean the people who aren’t in hospital – how would you even start that email? Actually, to be honest, I wouldn’t want an email because when I’m in hospital (or even not in hospital) I get all stressed out with emails because generally I read them and then don’t have time, or the information needed, or even feel like replying straight away and then I keep it as new and it makes me feel guilty every time I see it. But being in a typing position and staring at a screen can be quite hard when you’re feeling all sickly and tired. BUT, I think post is a yes! I think sending a letter would be a better idea! It feels more personal and I would be more likely to reply if I wasn’t feeling great because I could just dictate to my mum and write a card back. Haa, you guys know I love post. I actually need to reply to a letter (sorry Becky!!) but I do always reply even if it takes a while. Although..emails are kind of like leaving comments on here and I absolutely love it when you guys leave comments. I don’t ever really know how to respond to your comments though because I never know whether you write with an intent on a reply. Sometimes I reply, sometimes I don’t but I always read each one.
A couple of years ago (omg it’s been that long with this cancer that I can now talk in years) I was in hospital having transplant investigations (I was going to have a live liver transplant but then they found secondaries in my lungs so couldn’t go ahead) and I received a parcel at hospital – like delivered to the hospital but addressed for me! It was a big box and all the nurses were very excited by it, so one of them opened it up for me and out popped 3 helium balloons, a chocolate smelling teddy and a box of truffles. That was a good day.
But emailing? I honestly don’t know..If you’ve got lots to talk about or..omg! or!! If you were going to send an email a day with an awesome thing in it (maybe from  then that would be good. Or if you were a fellow cancer surviving being then that’s okay (I’m in email talks with someone like that at the moment and it’s nice to hear that she’s having the same experiences). But any email saying anything pitying at all would be a complete no way. I will say that it is always nice to know that someone is thinking of you.

I don’t really know if I answered that question. I’m also not really sure if that was what you meant Jan…but I gave my opinion anyway 🙂

Haha you guys, I meant questions about my results! But I am enjoying this question thing already! Any others?

Robin did you get my reply? Either shrimp pate or salmon en croute.


3 Responses to “Question.”

  1. Ro January 13, 2011 at 1:34 pm #

    There is a charity set up for just this!! Only for children though –
    It’s a great thing to be involved in. There are lots of children and young people; a number of them have cancer but there are many other illnesses too. You can email them, but sending post is preferable – it’s great for the kids to have something to open when they’re feeling down. Some people send gifts but just cards and postcards are very much encouraged.
    You can sign up to be assigned a Pal – you send post to one specific child/young person every two weeks.

    One prerequisite is that you do not expect a reply. Lots of the children are too ill to have time to reply, or have learning difficulties that mean they can’t write, or other reasons. I never include an address so they can’t reply anyway.
    Would you be more open to the idea of emails, Rosie, if people didn’t expect a reply, or if you actually couldn’t reply? (eg if they did it through some online form that anonymised the sender)

    One great thing about PostPals is that the siblings are very much included, so you can write to the brothers and sisters of children who are in hospital, and provide support and smiles for them – they have a tough time too!

    They have a guide to what to say and what not to say (no pitying allowed!) here:

    Anyway sorry plug over. Just thought this might have been what you were looking for, Jan.

  2. Dollydimple January 13, 2011 at 3:37 pm #

    That looks good Ro. I have a son in key stage2 having chemo – I agree with Rosie, when in hospital he would not feel like having pressure to reply to e-mails but post is great fun (especially if he didn’t need to reply!) Facebook is great if people are in hospital for a long time as they can see what everyone else is up to and post comments if they feel up to it.

  3. Ro January 13, 2011 at 4:39 pm #

    You could register your son to become a Pal! The info is here
    You’d need to send them some kind of proof (hospital letter etc) that your son is having treatment.

    Definitely no need to reply. It’s expected that you update your page on PostPals occasionally (see the website for current Pals and their updates) and use can always use that to thank people for what they’ve sent, but no need to reply at all.

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